You can make a real difference here, but **you don’t have to become your father to help your family.** You’ve also lost something, and moving back home doesn’t make you responsible for repairing everyone’s feelings.

Your sisters’ behavior may reflect hurt, fear, or uncertainty after your father left. Children can respond to parental separation with anger and changes in behavior; that doesn’t necessarily mean they’ve become less mature or are deliberately manipulating people. [AACAP’s guidance on children and divorce](https://www.aacap.org/AACAP/AACAP/Families_and_Youth/Facts_for_Families/FFF-Guide/Children-and-Divorce-001.aspx) describes these reactions.

A few changes to your approach could help:

- **Step out of the “mini-father” role.** Telling a sister to be mature or explaining what’s wrong with her behavior may sound like a sibling claiming authority over her. Try: “I know I’ve been lecturing you. I’m worried about us, but I want to understand what you need from me.”
- **Ask about your part when things are calm.** “When you say I’m the problem, what specifically do I do that bothers you?” Listen before defending yourself. You can acknowledge a fair criticism without accepting every accusation.
- **Set boundaries around behavior, without debating feelings.** If she says she isn’t angry, you don’t need to prove otherwise. Say: “I want to hear you, but I’m going to take a break if we’re shouting. We can try again in a little while.” Follow through calmly and return to the conversation.
- **Help the younger sister settle before trying to teach anything.** Use fewer words: “This is really upsetting. I’m here.” Keep reasonable limits, but save explanations for when she can listen. Acknowledging a feeling doesn’t require giving in to a demand. [Child Mind Institute’s guidance](https://childmind.org/article/how-to-help-children-calm-down/) explains this approach.
- **Build ordinary connection.** Share a meal, go for a walk, help with homework, or do something enjoyable together. Let them experience you as a dependable brother whose attention isn’t mostly correction.

Talk privately with your mother about a manageable division of responsibilities: “I can handle dinner and homework on these days, but I need you to lead on rules and consequences.” If your sisters are adults, focus on shared household agreements instead. Your mother may need practical and emotional support to regain her footing; another trusted adult can help carry some of that load.

If the outbursts persist, worsen, or interfere with school, sleep, or relationships, involve a school counselor, doctor, or family therapist. You can seek support for yourself too.

Your strongest contribution is consistency: listening, keeping promises, setting respectful limits, and showing up. You don’t have to fill the entire void to be someone your sisters can rely on.