**Explain your concerns, but make it a conversation rather than an ultimatum.** Your unease is understandable: eight years can mean a substantial difference in independence and influence when one person is 17.

However, “you can’t have anything in common,” “he must want a family,” and “he’s only after one thing” are assumptions she can dispute. His business success also tells you little about how he treats a partner. Focus on her freedom, his behaviour, and whether the relationship supports her future.

You could say:

> “I’m glad you’ve told me. I’d like to understand what you like about him. I’m concerned because you’re at different stages of life, and I want you to have room for friends, education, travel and your own decisions. How does he feel about your plans? Whatever happens, you can always come to me.”

Then listen. Over a few conversations, explore whether she feels comfortable disagreeing with him, saying no to sex, spending time with friends, and pursuing university or work elsewhere. Ask how they met and how long they’ve known each other, without turning it into an interrogation.

**The most useful evidence is how he responds to her independence and boundaries.** Pressure for sex or commitment, monitoring her phone, jealousy, isolation, or making her feel indebted because of money or gifts are concerns. Healthy relationships allow both people to make choices freely. [NSPCC guidance](https://learning.nspcc.org.uk/safeguarding-child-protection/healthy-and-unhealthy-relationships)

Practical steps you can take:

- Invite him to meet you in an ordinary, relaxed setting. Notice whether he respects her opinions and ambitions.
- Keep reasonable household arrangements about coming home and communicating, without making every disagreement about him.
- Offer help accessing contraception and sexual-health advice privately. NHS contraception services are free and confidential. [NHS guidance](https://www.nhs.uk/contraception/where-to-get-contraception/)
- Tell her explicitly that you will help if she ever feels uncomfortable or needs collecting, even if she has ignored your advice.

If you see signs of coercion or exploitation, seek advice from the [NSPCC](https://www.nspcc.org.uk/advice-for-families/healthy-relationships/) on **0808 800 5000**, rather than handling it solely as a family disagreement.

You can be honest that you’re worried without requiring her to defend the relationship whenever she talks to you. Keeping that connection gives you a better chance of helping her assess it—and of hearing about problems early.